Mary Luray Waxse

Mary Luray Waxse, who devoted her life to family and community, died of natural causes on January 17, 2016 at Brewster Place in Topeka, Kansas. She was born on October 11, 1920 in Cincinnati, Ohio. She is predeceased by her parents John and Ada (Beesler) Poole, and her half-brother, Arthur Weihe. She graduated from Walnut Hills High School in 1937 and received a diploma in nursing from the Jewish General Hospital in 1941, the same year she eloped with one of the medical interns, I. Joseph Waxse. They began their 51-year partnership as doctor and nurse and husband and wife when they moved to Altamont, Kansas, where he set up a family practice and she assisted him on house calls and made their home there. A few years later they moved to the nearby town of Oswego where they lived above an 18-bed hospital that they administrated and helped to staff for several years. Their four children were born and raised in Oswego, David John in 1945, Paula Nina in 1947, Sylvia Luray in 1949 and Joseph Arthur in 1951.

In addition to being a busy mother and supportive wife, Mary was a community leader in the town of 2,000 people. She led a Girl Scout troop for more than 15 years and was the youngest state president of the Women's Auxiliary of the Kansas Medical Society. Her hospitality was generous and far reaching, through placements of many foreign students in the Experiment in International Living program and the boarding of 52 different physicians in training with the KUMC preceptorship program. She had a lasting influence on many of these young adults and a few of them became lifelong family friends; in particular, Maria Griebichler from Austria, Norma Romano (Benner) from Bolivia, and Ada Moranjic from Sarajevo adopted Mary as their North American mother.

She resumed her nursing career after the children had left home and she and Joseph moved to Topeka, Kansas in 1967. In charge of organizing and providing quality healthcare services for the Youth Center at Topeka, she was also a constant source of human kindness and sensible advice for these youths and their families. She took seriously her continuing education requirements and kept her nursing license up to date and her mind active as a student well into her eighties. She also continued her active involvement in civic affairs by participating in the Topeka Women's Club; steadfastly attending Topeka Symphony performances; serving on the board and providing donations to the Community Youth Home, a boy's housing program; and participating in the meetings and conferences of Zonta International and the Women's Auxiliary of the Kansas Medical Society. She was one of the first volunteers for the Shawnee County Court Appointed Special Advocates (CASA) and for many years advocated on behalf of children in difficult court cases, often giving care above and beyond what was officially expected.

The most difficult blow in her later years was the loss of her beloved partner Joe in 1992. Close friends and family helped her to cope but could never fill the gap created by his absence. For as long as she could, before dementia disabled her, she played a central role in the lives of her four children and their spouses (Judy Pfannenstiel, Linda Waxse, Joseph Goering, Charles Mansfield and Marianne Waxse) as well as her grandchildren and their spouses (Rachel & John Bartel, Rebecca Waxse & Sam Surface, Ryan & Marlene Waxse, Elayna Waxse, Seth Goering, Johanna & Ben Jones, Megan & Christer Hanson, Adam Mansfield & Anne Dotter, Mark Mansfield, and Bennett, Jay and Caroline Waxse). Eight great- grandchildren survive her: Kaylee & Laine Bartel, Waylon Waxse, Sullivan Surface, Louis & Zachary Dotter-Mansfield, and Hadlee & Ellie Hanson.

This is a brief summary of the basic facts of the life of a nurturing woman with a strong character who had many close friends and made a lasting impression on all those who knew her. It does not capture the sense of adventure that spurred her to ride an elephant in Thailand and kiss the Blarney stone in Ireland, or the sense of humor that fueled her delightful and easy laughter. It provides some idea of the legacy of a lifetime of caring for the many that she loved. The family is grateful to the staff of Brewster Place who have provided compassionate and competent care since 2010.

A memorial service will be held at 1:00 p.m. on Saturday, February 20 in the chapel of the Main Building at Brewster Place,1205 SW 29th St. , Topeka, KS 66611. Refreshments will be served in the lounge of the main building after the service. Private entombment will take place at Mount Hope Cemetery.

Donations in her name can be made to CASA of Shawnee County, 420 SE Jefferson Street, Topeka, KS 66607.

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